No, I don't want to be a FCSB!

So whilst G-chatting with one of my most awesome friends, Jordan, today, I realized something.  Well, first, let me just post a bit of our convo to get you in the zone:

me: I'm trying to find a job and I just want to pull my hair out, scream, cry, and eat chocolate all the time.
Jordan: i know that's super hard
me: Yeah :/ And the whole eating chocolate thing doesn't do well with my wedding diet/exercise program. haha
Jordan: hahaha
yeah i've been working out 5 or 6 days a week
training for a 10k in a few weeks
and then i'm doing a triathlon in the fall with some coworkers
for me, it helped to have something to train for
instead of just having a general "i'm going to lose weight for the wedding" thing
because that was too easy for me to cheat with
like "oh, yes i will eat all of this bread because the wedding is still months away"
me: haha yes, the bread thing - totally me
Jordan: "i don't need to go running this morning, i've got so much time"
but with having an actual race coming up, i've gotta build up my stamina
and i've come a long way since the fall
i went from only being able to run like 5-10 minutes at a time to now being able to run for over an hour without stopping
me: And you're already so good-looking! Gahhh! I'm gonna be like a flesh-colored Shrek bride!
That's. awesome. You're awesome.
Jordan: FLESH COLORED SHREK BRIDE IS MY FAVORITE PHRASE OF 2014
i love you and you will look NOTHING like a FCSB
me: YASSSS! I'm so glad it's a thing now. With its own acronym and everything.
In fact, I'm going to write a blog post entitled FCSB and mention this very conversation. I may even copy and paste.

So, in conclusion, I don't want to be a FCSB.  I refuse.  My current goals are:

1. Find a dress.

2. Find a job.

3. Eat healthy.

4. Exercise er'day (or almost every day)...

5. Lose weight, look great - No FCSB here. 

Have a great day, everyone :)  

Graduated & Engaged: A Journey Frought With Tears and Laughter

So I'm definitely not bored anymore - that's for sure!

As of the middle of December, I am a graduate of Liberty University Online with my degree in Human Services. Which I still don't know what to do with. And tons of debt - yay! Perfect.

Obviously, that means I am now looking for another part-time job or a full-time job. Aka, I need more money. lol

And now to my more exciting and less depressing news - I AM ENGAGED! *cue celebratory music and confetti and balloons and dancing monkeys*  Our wedding date, as of right now, is set for September 13, 2014.  But that might change.  Because, you know, for-sure wedding dates are so overrated.

Here's a link to our website.  You should visit and sign the guest book and donate towards my wedding fund.  Haha  Just kidding about that last part! ....Kinda.

Anyway, thanks for being happy for me, and here's some wedding-y type things to leave you with:

The engagement ring :)

Cake Topper that I LOVE!

Brady Bunch-esque bridal party pose!

Adorable ring bearer/flower girl photo :)

I love mason jars, sheet music, and flowers...

...And lace.

...And floating candles :P

What our wedding cake will (hopefully) look like!

Idea for the getaway.

Last Blog Post of 2012 (Most Likely)

Wow!  This year has flown by fast!  I can't believe I've only written 7 posts this whole year, and last year, I wrote almost 7 times that many!!

A lot has happened in my life this year.  Some notable events:
1) I am 30 pounds lighter than I was in January (yay!)
2) I now work as a receptionist at Faith Baptist Church on MWF, and I love it!
3) I work as a babysitter for 3 adorable children and their parents (well, obviously, I don't babysit the parents; just the kids).
4) I am approximately $2,500 more in debt than I was in January (But I have completed 4 more classes toward my Masters degree!)
5) This summer, I took an intensive toward my degree program at Liberty University, and it challenged my view on my expectations in life and in relationships.  Praise God for His conviction and teaching power!!
6) I joined a band!  It's a Christian Rock group called Boomarang Trip.  I love it!  (I wanna see!)
7) I've made a lot of friends this year, and gotten closer to some old ones as well!  Some names that come to mind: Stephanie Short, Tim Kittelstad, Amy Hiebert, Chase Riner, Luke Alcala, Elvis Le, Tyler Volpe, Beka Leonard, and Rachel Leonard.
8) My BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WORLD, Hannah Osborne, is now Hannah Hancock, as of this past May.  Yesssssss :)
9) I have been writing music lately, and I'm in the process of learning guitar!
10) I got a NEW CAR!  No more Buick Century clunker!  I am now sporting a Chrysler Sebring!

Those are just a few things that I'm praising and thanking God for!  He is SO GOOD!

Quiet Night, Raucous Thoughts

(Originally written as a Note on Facebook on Saturday, October 6, 2012, at 10:39 pm)

My mind is everywhere tonight. I am sitting in a virtual stranger's house, babysitting two extremely beautiful children who are asleep, and I didn't bring a book to read so I'm at odds as to what to do. So, of course, I initially Facebook stalk people. Which led me to my friend Kelly Ann's most recent blog post, which was beautiful to read. And then I thought, "When was the last time I posted a blog?" So I figured I'd write a note that showed my heart and what's been going on inside it lately - hopefully this does just that, and God uses it to, in some way, bring glory to Himself. Because that's what my life should be all about. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

*deep breath*

Okay, so, as many of you who know me already know (haha, are you lost yet?), many of my friends as of late have been getting married or engaged. Which makes sense, because it's about that time in my life where friends will do that; I'm just at that age. But God never cites a specific age for finding THE ONE; it's in His timing, which is vastly different from mine. So anyway, friends getting engaged and married - check. And how do you think this made me feel?....sorry, I mean, how do you think I initially reacted to this? Like a spoiled brat. "God, why can't I get married like everyone else? Why am I still single? Why haven't I found THE ONE yet? WHYYYYYY?!" ...you get the picture. Now that I think back on it, it's kind of embarrassing...

So this was my attitude. And I was getting more and more frustrated with the "LACK" of attention I was receiving from the opposite sex; I was finding everything to blame it on - such as guys being "shallow," other girls being more "aggressive" and "flirty" than I was... dumb stuff. My heart was growing ugly and bitter. So foul.

I went to do my intensive up at Liberty this summer, and God COMPLETELY wrecked my heart and my emotions with the realization that I was being INCREDIBLY SINFUL, PETTY, AND BRATTY. I was SO focused on my discontentment that I was fully missing everything that God was trying to do in my life. Praise God, just like He brought me out of my most recent ungodly relationship, He brought me out of my most recent ungodly nonrelationship. (That may not make sense to you, but it makes sense to me.)

When I came back from my intensive, my attitude had totally changed. It was definitely a work of God and not of myself, because it was miraculous. I felt so free and light and amazing. But my flesh and the Enemy had other plans. A few weeks ago, I started to grow discontent once more. I began to desire to settle for right now and satisfy my fleshly longing to be in a relationship rather than continue to serve God and patiently wait.

Sometimes I really despise the word PATIENCE. It is not a fruit of the Spirit that comes naturally to me. Which, when you think about it, is a weird statement to make, because none of the fruits of the Spirit are natural, that's why they come from the Spirit and not ourselves. But I think out of all the things that the Spirit supplies me with, I quench patience the most.

So anyway, I began to get impatient. And grow discontent. And, just like He always does, God used His Word and the Spirit and fellow believers in my life to hold up the mirror and show me my UGLY. Praise God. Even though it's hard...especially in the quiet, lonely times (like right now)...God is good. And He has given me so many defenses against my deceitful heart, my flesh, and the Enemy.

Once again, God focused my gaze on what matters most in life, which is NOT ME BEING HAPPY. That should not be my life goal. God forbid I should EVER forsake all else to pursue my own wants in lieu of what God wants. What matters most in life is that I GLORIFY GOD WITH ALL THAT IS IN ME. That I seek to be conformed to His image. Because His image is the original. Mine is just the copy. And I am but dust. God, fill me with more of You, because I long to respond to You...You won't relent (Praise God!)...great is Thy faithfulness. So many songs are coming to mind right now. I think I will go praise you through music. :)

Fear Not! I am Still Alive!! =)

Sorry it's been so long since I've updated! A lot has happened in the past six months. Let's see, where to begin...? Well, first of all, I began working as a nanny for 3 adorable children in the month of March. Their names are Trey (6), Elizabeth Claire (4), and Jesse (2). Right now they are on a 2 1/2 week vacation in the Florida Keys which I was supposed to be on, but it didn't happen, because the morning of the trip, I woke up sick, and I'm still recovering. Here are some pictures of the cuties!

^This is Trey, the oldest. He is so independent and strong-willed! I told him that he will definitely be a manager or a boss when he grows up!

^This is Elizabeth Claire, the middle child. She is very much a little lady, and she is always asking me to play games and read to her.

^Here is EC again. This picture was taken when we went to a petting zoo/farm back in June. It was a fun day for the kids!

^Here is Jesse, the 2-year-old. He likes to get into EVERYTHING! Even just watching him is a job in and of itself!!

<3 :) So those are the kids I babysit for during the week. Aren't they adorable? I've also been working on getting my Masters degree in Professional Counseling through Liberty University since last October. The first week of this month, I drove up with my mom to Liberty for a week-long intensive. And intense it was! It was a class which covered the basic skills and techniques used in counseling, so throughout the week, we practiced counseling each other. I talked WAY more about my life that week than I have in a LOOOOOOOONG time! It was exhausting! But well worth it =) I learned many things that I believe I will be able to implement in my future career - whatever that may be. During our roadtripping to and from Virginia, my mom and I stopped at my Aunt's and Uncle's house in South Carolina to visit with their family (which includes them and my cousin, Aaron). We went hiking (well, what hiking we could do with it being so hot outside) and sightseeing in Greenville, South Carolina. What's that? You want to see pictures? Ok!

^This is me and my cousin, Aaron, being awesome at Reedy River in Greenville, SC.

^Me and madre =)

^Me, Mom, and Aunt Joan at a place called...I think it was Table Rock?

^Uncle Stephen, Aaron, and I all climbed and hiked for over 30 minutes to find this waterfall (which was barely at a trickle because of the lack of rain recently)!

^About to enjoy a delicious meal together! So as you can see, it was tons of fun =) I'm so glad it happened and I can't wait to visit them again!! Another thing I've been up to is volleyball on Tuesday nights. Of course. It is my weekly stress relief, and, I'm ashamed to admit, the only form of exercise I get in my life as of late. But I love it. And every week I have had to miss has been TORTURE! I'm hoping to start up the volleyball league again this August - and hopefully, my team will dominate! Aaaaand the most important thing that has happened in my life in the past 6 months - I was able to see my best friend in the world, Hannah Isobel Osborne, become Hannah Isobel Hancock on May 19th!

^I got to see Marris and Tim, 2 people I worked with at Camp Gilead! Yay =)

^Hannah and myself at the reception. How happy does she look?!

^AND I got to see Luke, Geezer, and SISTER! Score! All in all, it was a great time. I have great friends. And my life has been amazing so far =) Can't wait to see what God has in store. My next post will be just pictures - so watch out!!!!! Later! =))))))))))))))))))))))

More recap from my life.

Well, since I had to leave in such a hurry yesterday, I figured I could continue my recap today =)
Sometime after I got home from Germany and before I left for my cruise, I went on a trip to Ormond Beach with about half of my church. lol

Milanie and I had a competition to see who could fit more gummi life savers on her pinkie finger...both of our pinkies ended up purple. haha

Attempting to play Take Two using Cheez-its with letters on them. Except Caleb was eating more than he was playing...cheater.

Dakota and I riding a ginormous turtle...like in "Finding Nemo" hahahaha

...Our feet were dirty...?

We carved our names on a table in the pizza place where we had dinner. Classic ;)

I know none of these were pictures actually taken ON the beach, but I had more important things to do than take pictures the whole time ;)

The next major event that happened was my sister, Sara's, bridal shower. We had it at my other sister, Jessica's, house. The morning of the shower, October 15th, my grandmother, Joyce Acree Landers, passed away. It was a bittersweet experience, because she had been sick for awhile. I know that she's gone home to be with the Lord and that I will see her again one day. =)

Future brothers-in-law helping with the decorating. Precious moment #1

Precious moment #2: Aunt Sara and her niece, Bella, getting ready for the shower.

The amazing cake for the happy couple.

Precious moment #3: My little Who-like nephew, Liam.

Sara with her FAVORITE niece and nephew :)

And here's the happy couple now!

The contestants in the toilet-paper wedding gown competition. Guess who won?!

The attendees of the shower taking the "Paul & Sara" quiz I cooked up about...well, Paul and Sara =) The winners - Ruth and Leticia (Paul's younger sisters) tied at 14/20 questions!

Time to open presents! While they opened presents, we played Bridal Bingo. Marianne won!

Aww, their first "fight" as a couple...?

Then they made up :)

L to R: Leticia, Ruth, Paul, Sara, and Mrs. Ramnarine, Paul's mother.

L to R: Mom, Sara, Bella, Jessica, and me!

After the shower, family started arriving to attend Grandma's funeral. It was a beautiful day of celebration, but also a solemn day of remembrance. There wasn't a dry eye in the house. Her testimony of raising seven godly children and the contributions she made to her church were beautiful to witness.

Not much else happened between the funeral and Sara's bachelorette party other than me starting Liberty online (sooo much work) and beginning a tutoring job with the Polk County School Board. Obviously, I can't show you ALL the pictures from the Bachelorette party/surprise lingerie shower. But here are the ones I can show you:

Marianne and the chocolate fountain. Mmmm!

The caterer, Jessica ;)

Sara's face when she opened the first gift and realized what kind of party this REALLY was!

...And when she opened mine and Jessica's gift. Classic =)

Playing Boxers or Briefs. It's a Parker Bros. game, so it's not as racy as it sounds! lol

The bride and bridesmaids (minus Danielle and Leticia, plus Kassi)

The next weekend, 11-12-11, the big day had finally arrived. My sister's wedding!

Waiting for the photographer...

Me, Jessica, Sara, Bella, and Mom =)

Mother and Daughter =)

Ruth, Sara, and Leticia - sisters-in-law <3

Jessica and Matt with their little flower girl!

Amy, Alona, Christina, and Hannah - the musicians for the wedding.

My sister and her family <3

Reppin' FBC!

Sisters =)

Unity candle. During the lighting of it, Hannah and I sang "How Deep the Father's Love for us" while Alona played the piano and Amy played the cello.

Bride and flower girl.

Bride and nephew, Liam.

The ONLY picture I was able to get of the couple!

So there you have. My life, in a nutshell, since I got home from Germany. Hope these pictures make you happy! Have a wonderful day, and there's more to come soon!